twelve: i know you love me so, but it's time to let me go

Song: Time to Let Me Go, Gloriana


I woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of my phone. Nobody ever calls me, especially not at 230am. I adjusted my eyes to the dark and fished around my bed for my phone. Ryan. Why was Ryan calling me so late?

“Hello?” I groaned.

“Julie?”

“Hey Ryan”

“I’m really sorry I’m calling so late” he said. He didn’t sound like himself.

“It’s fine” I yawned, “What’s up?”

“I’m--I’m probably being stupid when I’m calling this drunk but--”

“Wait you’re drunk? Why are you drunk? Where is Remy?” I asked frantically.

“She’s with her grandparents” he said. I just breathed a sigh of relief, “I went out with the guys”

“Don’t you think you should just get some sleep Ryan?” I told him.

“I can’t” he said, “I need to tell you something, I didn’t want to before, because…I din’t want you to think I was weak”

“Ryan, why don’t you just call me in the morning, when you’re sober?”

“Anna didn’t cheat on me with just Carey” he replied ignoring my request completely, “This has happened before”

“Ryan, I wouldn’t put it past her, it’s okay”

“The first time was with one of my teammates. During the first year we were together, when she was pregnant with Remy, I caught her with Danny Briere, who was a Sabre at the time…”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” I replied, “That’s just not right”

“She apologized” he simply said, “I wanted to be a good parent, so…oh and when Remy was almost 2, I caught her again”

“With who?” I was starting to get furious now.

“Vinny Lecavalier, when she came on the road with me…”

“Dude. She’s a whore. He’s got a girlfriend!” I replied.

“It was a one time thing” he sighed.

“I’m sorry Ryan” I said sweetly, “You don’t deserve that”

“Oh and the third time, was a few months ago, with one of our junior guys” he said, “I just felt like when she got with Carey that it wasn’t unusual, I was so mad that it had to be your boyfriend, of all people”

“Well I guess it’s unlucky on my part” I replied with a shrug, “but it proved to me that he obviously is not the one. Even if we were together for 4 years”

“I want to castrate him for what he made you want to do” he replied with anger in his voice.

“What are you talking about?” I knew what he was talking about, I just refused to go back there.

“Jules if you’d drowned…I would have died too…”

“That’s a tad dramatic Ryan, I mean, I’m really sorry I put you through that…”

“I’m sorry I just…” he hesitated, “Something happened tonight Julie”

“What?” I asked nervously.

“I saw Anna with another guy…that wasn’t Price…” he said it slowly. As if to make sure I heard him correctly. I’m surprised he was this articulate when he was drunk.

“But…I thought she was here…in Montreal” I replied, “Are you sure you weren’t seeing things?”

“No, because she said something to me” he sighed, “this was before I was drunk, fucking Stafford, making me do Jagerbombs…Ugh…anyways…”

“What did she say Ryan?” I was beginning to get impatient.

“Does the name Gorges mean anything to you? I swear I’ve heard it before. She said she found someone even better than Price, and she called him Gorges. Which meant gorgeous in French or something…?”

I just laughed as his lack of knowledge before I replied, “He’s Price’s teammate. Shit…she’s fucking his teammate. I can’t let her get to that team. She’ll run through all of them if she can…”

“Jules, I donno what to do”

“I’ll fly down there and strangle her myself if I have to”

“Murder is not an option Julie!” he replied.

“Yes, I know, but in her case…anything is legal”

“I’m sorry” he sighed, “But I just had to call you, I know the sober me wouldn’t be able to do it”

“It’s fine” I replied with a yawn, “I have to talk to him though. I may not want to care about him, but I still do. I won’t let her hurt him”

“Yah, she seems to be good at that…”

“I need some sleep Ryan, it’s almost 3am. I have some people I need to talk to tomorrow…or rather, later today”

“Ok, I guess I’ll go then. Don’t worry I’m home…I just hate how she did that after I told her…”

“Well she makes her own choices” I replied, “not a whole lot we can do. I’ll talk to you later Ryan. Go to bed please”

“I’m a scratch--” and it sounded like he passed out. I just sighed and hung up my phone. It wasn’t long before I was out cold myself.

--

I woke up fairly early. I was absolutely exhausted but I knew I was never going to get back to sleep now. I had a long day ahead of me. I needed to talk to Price, he had to know about Anna.

I grabbed my phone and hoped to catch Price before he headed to practice. I heard the rings one, two, three, “Hello?”

“Price…”

“Julie?”

“Yes, we have to talk, it’s important”

“Of course” he said, “I’ll be there in five minutes”

“Don’t you have practice?”

“It’s an optional skate, and it’s not for another hour, we don’t play tonight, I’ll be right there”

Before I could argue with him he hung up and I just sighed. I had to admit I was a tad nervous that I was about to face him. I didn’t need a repeat of last time, I couldn’t let myself fall into his little trap again. It’s just those damn eyes…

“Julie!?” I heard frantic knocking and I slowly walked to the door and opened it.

“So what’s up?” he asked. What, so are we best friends now?

“It’s about Anna…”

“She went back to Buffalo”

“I know” I replied, “Um, this is really hard for me to say”

“What?”

“She’s been with other guys while she was with Ryan. Briere, Lecavelier, even one of the junior players a few months ago. She’s fucking Gorges now…”

His face lost all color at this point. The look in his eyes almost scared me. I did all I could think of, I just put my hand on his cheek, “Carey…”. He finally looked down at me and sighed.

“I’m sorry” he said.

“I know” I replied, “I just thought I should tell you, you need to forget about her, she’s not worth it, she’ll hurt you”

“Since when do you care about if I get hurt or not”

“I’m pissed off at what you did, I’m not a cold hearted bitch Carey”

“You still care…”

“Price, we were together for 4 years. Feelings like that don’t go away overnight ok?” I sighed turning away from him and going towards the kitchen, “you should get going”

I felt his hands grab the hem of my shirt and pull me back, they slid around my waist and his lips gently brushed against the back of my neck, making me shiver.

“You remember when I used to make love to you?” he whispered into my ear as his hands wandered under my shirt onto my stomach. His hands were still cold, making me shiver again. He knew I gave in way to easily.

“I do” I said.

“I can do that right now” he whispered again gently brushing his lips against my ear. I have to tell you, I almost lost my composure right then and there. Ryan’s face came to my mind immediately and I grabbed his hands and pulled them off of me.

“You’re not doing that to me again. You’re taking advantage of my vulnerability Carey”

“I’m sorry…”

“You need to go, and if you see Gorges, tell him what I told you. Just…tell him she’s not who she says she is. Tell him to steer clear of her, as you should”

“Alright…”

He didn’t budge. He just stood there, staring at me, “Price. Get out, please!” I was ready to cry at this point.

He didn’t reply, he just left the apartment and I felt a few stray tears fall. This was beginning to get way too hard to handle, I was ready to just give in to him and take him back, but I knew that was a weak move. I couldn’t do that to myself.

I decided to go out that night. I needed some time to myself, I didn’t care that I had no one to go with, the drinks and the loud music could distract me from all of this.

I changed into a pair of dark jeans a black and white empire waist top and I slipped on my black chucks. I grabbed my clutch and left the apartment, making my way to a small club just around the corner.

I sat at the bar and got myself a beer. He set the bottle and a glass in front of me and I just took the bottle and turned to face the dance floor. This was what I needed. A few harmless flirts and some drinks.

I was talking to a random guy, cute, when I heard a familiar voice. This couldn’t be happening to me, not tonight. I turned around and saw her face. Seriously, was she to be everywhere that Ryan and I ended up going.

She was ordering something at the bar when she turned to see my face. A sly smirk appeared and she made her way over.

“I thought you were pregnant” I snapped.

“Miscarriage”

“I’m sorry” I said sarcastically.

“I’m sure you are” she said moving closer to my face. I stood up and pushed her away from me, “You get out of my face you whore”

“I’m the whore?”

“Briere, Vinny and some poor junior kid, oh and then Price and Gorges, honestly. I’m glad I told them to steer clear of you”

“That’s why Josh won’t return my calls?” she asked with a glare.

“I guess so” I said smiling proudly.

She lifted her hand and slapped me across the face. It really didn’t bother me, I’ve felt worse before. A crowd started to gather when I shoved her to try to walk away, but she wouldn’t let me.

“I’m not done with you” she said.

“You’re not done with me?” I asked half laughing, “How are you not tired travelling back and forth from Montreal to Buffalo fucking any guy that takes an interest in you?”

She just shook her head and looked the other way.

“You said you miscarried right?” I asked her.

Before she could answer I took my right hand and punched her in the stomach. I heard some cheers from the people surrounding us.

“Remy deserves a mother that is there for her, and not one that’s not out fucking everything in sight” I said trying to get away from her again.

She grabbed my arm and swung me around bitch slapping me again, “Is that all you know how to do Anna? Seriously?”

“You do not talk about my daughter like that”

“Now you act like you care” I huffed. At that comment she jumped me, now it was a full on cat fight. Hair pulling, I even got a couple punches in there, she scratched my neck, but that’s about all she got.

I felt two strong arms grab me and pull me away from her. I was out of breath and I pulled away from whoever was holding on to me. I looked behind me, it was Price.

“Of course” I huffed.

“You ok?”

“I’m perfectly fine” I said, “I’ve been in worse fights then this in Junior High” I said it loud enough for her to hear and she tried to jump me again, but some guy grabbed her arm and pulled her away from me.

“You sure you’re ok?” he asked me again.

“Price, I told you, I’m absolutely fine, ok? Stop pretending like you care about me. Get on with your life, please. We’re done, there is nothing else for us. I’m sorry, but I need to go, okay? Bye”

This all needs to end. I didn’t know how I was supposed to get away from all of this. She was everywhere I went, and so was he. Maybe it was time to leave Montreal, for good.